Breath Of Heaven
by Chelsea Oz
Summary: One shot. Janet is a divorced mom battling cancer. She takes a picture of her and Jack to her treatment appointment and leaves the treatment believing in miracles.


_Breath of heaven, hold me together._

 _Be forever near me, breath of heaven._

 _Breath of heaven, lighten my darkness._

 _Pour over me your holiness, for you are holy._

 _-Amy Grant, "Breath of Heaven"._

Janet Dawson was 67 years old and found herself in a cancer treatment center waiting room. She was all alone in this place on the eve of Christmas Eve. The loneliness that she had felt in that moment was overwhelming. The last thing she had wanted in her life was to be alone. She grew up with a big family, she had always had close friends to live with and then she had a husband and children to keep her occupied.

So why was she alone right now? She looked at the pretty, blonde receptionist who bared an uncanny resemblence to her once good friend, Teri Alden. Janet couldn't keep her eyes off her and when the Teri look-alike saw her, she smiled. Janet smiled a little back at her. She had a hard time smiling these days.

"Are you okay, honey?" The receptionist asked.

"Yes," Janet replied, meekly.

"You will be called in shortly. You do have a ride home, right?"

"Yes, my daughter will be picking me up."

"Good."

"Thank you," Janet said as the receptionist was called away on the telephone.

They are nice here, she thought. She looked around at the Christmas decorations and sighed heavily. This was definitely the worst Christmas season she was facing since she and Phillip had gotten divorced thirteen years ago. It was not a shock to anybody who knew the couple; they had issues for a number of years and that year they amicably decided to move on. It was hard on Janet and her children but she knew it was the right desicion in the long run for her family. The absolute worst thing about that Christmas season wasn't even the fact that it would be her first as a divorced woman: it was the fact that her dear friend, Jack Tripper, had dropped dead of a heart attack. She mourned for two men that Christmas; one living, one dead.

"Janet Dawson?" A brunette nurse had called out.

"Yes," Janet answered, as she got up and picked up her purse.

"Good morning," the nurse greeted.

"Good morning," Janet greeted back as she dug into her pant pocket for a small, framed photo. A photo that got her through all her chemotherapy treatments to date. She couldn't wait to look at it.

Janet was lead into her usual first room on the left as the nurse check her vitals and her weight. Every time she had come here, she would lose a few more pounds. When she heard the number on the scale, she gulped and looked down on her baggy clothes. She guessed she wasn't fooling anyone with what her cancer was doing to her. She held back her tears until the nurse had left and she was there to wait for the doctor. She could see herself clearly in the office window and the woman who looked back at her scared her. Her sunken face; her big, lifeless eyes; and her now bald head that was covered up with a hankerchief. How did she become her? Where did the old Janet go?

"Miss Dawson?" The doctor's voice boomed into the room.

"Yes," Janet replied, wiping away her tears.

"Are you all right?" He asked as he took a seat next to her. She shuddered at the sight of the big, long needle of "liquid gold" that would soon kill all she had left of her.

"Yes," she replied. She wanted to get this over with.

"Are you ready?"

"Yes."

The doctor got everything in place as Janet took out the picture that would give her peace. It was a picture of her on her wedding day and she had her arms wrapped around Jack. Someone could have swore he was the groom the way he kissed her smiling face in the picture. She missed his kisses, she missed the way he would smile at her, she missed all of him. Does he miss her? She missed her.

"Well, I'll be," the doctor said right after he pricked Janet with the liquid gold shot.

"What is it?" Janet asked, worried it was something about her.

"I think you have a special guest here with you."

"What do you mean?"

"Look out the window, Miss Dawson."

Janet turned around and saw that in the same window that caused her despair only minutes before, had brought her into awesome wonder. There was a big, beautiful monarch butterfly that had landed on the outside window sill. Janet became transfixed as she would come to realize that the butterfly was not going to leave her. Her treatment, that lasted an hour and a half long, was announced over and the butterfly had still never left Janet's sight.

"You can leave now, Miss Dawson," the doctor instructed.

"I will be out in just a minute," she replied, still looking out the window.

"Miraculous things do happen, don't they?" He asked with a knowing smile that Janet never saw.

"Sure do," Janet said as the doctor finally left her alone in the room. The butterfly was still there with her.

"It's okay," she whispered as she went to the window and gently placed her hand over the winged creature. "You can leave now. Thank you for coming."

The butterfly had fluttered his wings but was in no hurry to take off.

"It's okay," Janet repeated. "I'm okay, Jack."

When the butterfly finally flew away, that was when Janet knew that it was her beloved Jack. He had waited for her to call his name. Miraculous things do happen. She was not as alone as she thought; she had an angel who had seemingly been watching her all along. For the first time, she walked out of the treatment center with a smile. Her daughter, Courtney, was shocked to see her mom in such a state of happiness.

"I guess things went well?" Courtney asked as her mother got in the passenger seat.

"Yes, they did," Janet replied as she caught Courtney looking at hers and Jack's wedding photo.

"I wish I could have met him," Courtney said.

"He knew you. I used to send him your school pictures every year that we lived in New York City. He told me every year that you were a beautiful girl; that you looked just like me."

Courtney blushed and continued to drive in silence. As they stopped at a red light, Janet gasped at what she saw. That butterfly, the same one who stayed with her all through treatment, had landed on Courtney's rear view mirror.

"What is it, mom?" Courtney asked, startled.

"Oh, nothing," Janet replied as the butterfly flew away. "I guess I'm just tired."

"It's okay, mom," Courtney said as she squeezed her mother's hand.

"Courtney, I need you to promise me something."

"What, mom?"

"Promise me that you will always believe in miracles."


End file.
